The War with the Fnools

"The War with the Fnools" is a science fiction short story by Philip K. Dick. It was first published in Galaxy magazine in 1969.^[1]

The Fnools are invaders in the guise of two-foot-tall human beings. They take on the guise of Volkswagen mechanics, ethnic circus performers, and other similar business practitioners. A discovery is made by a Fnool that if one of their kind partakes in an activity associated with growing older (in this case tobacco and alcohol), the Fnool will gain two feet in height. The knowledge is spread, and as a result, the Fnools become indistinguishable from human beings, albeit temporarily, before one engages in sex and makes them inhumanly tall.

Dick said of the story:

"Well, once again we are invaded. And, humiliatingly, by a lifeform which is absurd. My colleague Tim Powers once said that Martians could invade us simply by putting on funny hats, and we'd never notice. It's a sort of low-budget invasion. I guess we're at the point where we can be amused by the idea of Earth being invaded. (And this is when they really zap you.)"^[2]

References

↑ http://www.locusmag.com/index/l441.htm#BOT
↑ Dick, Philip K. (1980). The Golden Man. United States: Berkley Books. pp. 333–334. ISBN 0-425-04288-X.

External links

The War with the Fnools title listing at the Internet Speculative Fiction Database

Works by Philip K. Dick

Novels

Gather Yourselves Together (1950)
Voices from the Street (1952)
Solar Lottery (1954)
Mary and the Giant (1954)
The World Jones Made (1954)
Eye in the Sky (1955)
The Man Who Japed (1955)
A Time for George Stavros (1956)
Pilgrim on the Hill (1956)
The Broken Bubble (1956)
The Cosmic Puppets (1957)
Puttering About in a Small Land (1957)
Nicholas and the Higs (1958)
Time Out of Joint (1958)
In Milton Lumky Territory (1958)
Confessions of a Crap Artist (1959)
The Man Whose Teeth Were All Exactly Alike (1960)
Humpty Dumpty in Oakland (1960)
Vulcan's Hammer (1960)
Dr. Futurity (1960)
The Man in the High Castle (1961)
We Can Build You (1962)
Martian Time-Slip (1962)
Dr. Bloodmoney, or How We Got Along After the Bomb (1963)
The Game-Players of Titan (1963)
The Simulacra (1963)
The Crack in Space (1963)
Clans of the Alphane Moon (1964)
The Three Stigmata of Palmer Eldritch (1964)
The Zap Gun (1964)
The Penultimate Truth (1964)
The Unteleported Man (1964)
The Ganymede Takeover (1965)
Counter-Clock World (1965)
Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep? (1966)
Nick and the Glimmung (1966)
Now Wait for Last Year (1966)
Ubik (1966)
Galactic Pot-Healer (1968)
A Maze of Death (1968)
Our Friends from Frolix 8 (1969)
Flow My Tears, the Policeman Said (1974)
Deus Irae (1976)
Radio Free Albemuth (1976; published 1985)
A Scanner Darkly (1977)
VALIS (1981)
The Divine Invasion (1981)
The Transmigration of Timothy Archer (1982)
The Owl in Daylight (unfinished)

Collections

A Handful of Darkness (1955)
The Variable Man (1956)
The Preserving Machine (1969)
The Book of Philip K. Dick (1973)
The Best of Philip K. Dick (1977)
The Golden Man (1980)
Robots, Androids, and Mechanical Oddities (1984)
I Hope I Shall Arrive Soon (1985)
The Collected Stories of Philip K. Dick (1987)
Beyond Lies the Wub (1988)
The Dark Haired Girl (1989)
The Father-Thing (1989)
Second Variety (1989)
The Days of Perky Pat (1990)
The Little Black Box (1990)
The Short Happy Life of the Brown Oxford (1990)
We Can Remember It for You Wholesale (1990)
The Minority Report (1991)
Second Variety (1991)
The Eye of the Sibyl (1992)
The Philip K. Dick Reader (1997)
Minority Report (2002)
Selected Stories of Philip K. Dick (2002)
Paycheck (2004)
Vintage PKD (2006)

Short stories

"Beyond Lies the Wub" (1952)
"The Gun" (1952)
"The Skull" (1952)
"The Little Movement" (1952)
"The Defenders" (1953)
"Mr. Spaceship" (1953)
"Piper in the Woods" (1953)
"Roog" (1953)
"The Infinites" (1953)
"Second Variety" (1953)
"The World She Wanted" (1953)
"Colony" (1953)
"The Cookie Lady" (1953)
"Impostor" (1953)
"Martians Come in Clouds" (1953)
"Paycheck" (1953)
"The Preserving Machine" (1953)
"The Cosmic Poachers" (1953)
"Expendable" (1953)
"The Indefatigable Frog" (1953)
"The Commuter" (1953)
"Out in the Garden" (1953)
"The Great C" (1953)
"The King of the Elves" (1953)
"The Trouble with Bubbles" (1953)
"The Variable Man" (1953)
"The Impossible Planet" (1953)
"Planet for Transients" (1953)
"Some Kinds of Life" (1953)
"The Builder" (1953)
"The Hanging Stranger" (1953)
"Project: Earth" (1953)
"The Eyes Have It" (1953)
"Tony and the Beetles" (1953)
"Prize Ship" (1954)
"Beyond the Door" (1954)
"The Crystal Crypt" (1954)
"A Present for Pat" (1954)
"The Short Happy Life of the Brown Oxford" (1954)
"The Golden Man" (1954)
"James P. Crow" (1954)
"Prominent Author" (1954)
"Small Town" (1954)
"Survey Team" (1954)
"Sales Pitch" (1954)
"Time Pawn" (1954)
"Breakfast at Twilight" (1954)
"The Crawlers" (1954)
"Of Withered Apples" (1954)
"Exhibit Piece" (1954)
"Adjustment Team" (1954)
"Shell Game" (1954)
"Meddler" (1954)
"Souvenir" (1954)
"A World of Talent" (1954)
"The Last of the Masters" (1954)
"Progeny" (1954)
"Upon the Dull Earth" (1954)
"The Father-thing" (1954)
"Strange Eden" (1954)
"Jon's World" (1954)
"The Turning Wheel" (1954)
"Foster, You're Dead!" (1955)
"Human Is" (1955)
"War Veteran" (1955)
"Captive Market" (1955)
"Nanny" (1955)
"The Hood Maker" (1955)
"The Chromium Fence" (1955)
"Service Call" (1955)
"A Surface Raid" (1955)
"The Mold of Yancy" (1955)
"Autofac" (1955)
"Psi-man Heal My Child!" (1955)
"The Minority Report" (1956)
"To Serve the Master" (1956)
"Pay for the Printer" (1956)
"A Glass of Darkness" (1956)
"The Unreconstructed M" (1957)
"Misadjustment" (1957)
"Null-O" (1958)
"Explorers We" (1959)
"Recall Mechanism" (1959)
"Fair Game" (1959)
"War Game" (1959)
"All We Marsmen" (1963)
"Stand-by" (1963)
"What'll We Do with Ragland Park?" (1963)
"The Days of Perky Pat" (1963)
"If There Were No Benny Cemoli" (1963)
"Waterspider" (1964)
"Novelty Act" (1964)
"Oh, to Be a Blobel!" (1964)
"The War with the Fnools" (1964)
"What the Dead Men Say" (1964)
"Orpheus with Clay Feet" (1964)
"Cantata 140" (1964)
"A Game of Unchance" (1964)
"The Little Black Box" (1964)
"Precious Artifact" (1964)
"The Unteleported Man" (1964)
"Retreat Syndrome" (1965)
"Project Plowshare" (1965)
"We Can Remember It for You Wholesale" (1966)
"Holy Quarrel" (1966)
"Return Match" (1967)
"Faith of Our Fathers" (1967)
"Not by Its Cover" (1968)
"The Story to End All Stories" (1968)
"The Electric Ant" (1969)
"A. Lincoln, Simulacrum" (1969)
"The Pre-persons" (1974)
"A Little Something for Us Tempunauts" (1974)
"The Exit Door Leads In" (1979)
"Chains of Air, Web of Aethyr" (1980)
"Rautavaara's Case" (1980)
"I Hope I Shall Arrive Soon" (1980)
"The Alien Mind" (1981)
"Strange Memories of Death" (1984)
"Cadbury, the Beaver Who Lacked" (1987)
"The Day Mr. Computer Fell Out of Its Tree" (1987)
"The Eye of the Sibyl" (1987)
"Stability" (1987)
"Goodbye, Vincent" (1988)

Adaptations

Films	Blade Runner (1982) Total Recall (1990) Confessions d'un Barjo (1992) Screamers (1995) Impostor (2002) Minority Report (2002) Paycheck (2003) A Scanner Darkly (2006) Next (2007) Screamers: The Hunting (2009) Radio Free Albemuth (2010) The Adjustment Bureau (2011) Total Recall (2012) Blade Runner 2049 (2017)

TV series	Total Recall 2070 (1999) The Man in the High Castle (2015) Minority Report (2015)

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